I realize that the holiday season is reaching its climax and drawing to a close.
This feels like the perfect time to reflect on what has passed in the past year. I need to think on lessons learned. I know I want to continue to move toward greater transparency. I want to learn where I need to establish my emotional borders. I deserve the emotional space and time that I've often denied myself.
My feelings, my emotions, my wants and my needs matter. If someone can't respect that, I need to leave them behind. They can remain in 2018.
The longest night is ending. The light is returning. I want to leave buried those things that don't serve me. I need to leave behind the people that don't really love or respect me. I deserve better than such toxicity. I am deserving of real love.
I feel like I've been moving in the right direction for the past couple of years. I feel more centered. I feel stronger. I am getting in touch with the all the potential and possibility within myself.
I was never given credit for having ability or the capacity to be more. I was told that what I was wasn't right. I didn't fit into the box or the mold so that made me wrong, but I was never the problem. The problem laid with them and their inability to move outside of their comfortable, confining space.
I am finally in touch with that core of inner strength; that eternal core of infinite potential. The only voice I needed to listen to was my own.
I've shut out and turned off those critical voices that wore me down; that fractured and damaged me from the time of my earliest childhood. No more. You were wrong then and you're even more wrong now.
In 2019, I want to be open to love and possibility. Everything else can stay buried, right here in this cold hard earth.
I am repairing my inner fractures; mending my broken bits in true kintsugi style; more beautiful and more empowered than I ever was before.
I hope everyone feels warm and welcome wherever they've landed this holiday season. I hope the pain and the insecurities are falling away. I hope you've found the love that you deserve.
I hope to see you on the other side of this dark night.
We can watch the new sun rise together.