Updated: Nov 3, 2021
I love the idea of fidelity and loyalty. Find that one person that makes your soul sing; that loves you, flaws and all. Give them your loyalty. Allow yourself to be vulnerable with them. Start down a new path together. Love each other, for now and always, if you can.
Valentine's Day has just passed and my handfasting is fast approaching so I am cheating a little this week and posting another questionnaire, but love specific.
I've been seeing these posted on Facebook for the past few weeks and thought I would share mine.
How did you meet:
We met on an online dating site. I'd just set up my profile that morning and we started messaging within a hour or so. He asked me out for coffee after about six hours of chat and so our relationship began.
We were supposed to meet for a coffee in the late afternoon but his work day was crazy and he didn't really have a chance to have lunch so we instead met for dinner at a local pizzeria, Rotolo's.
Rotolo's still exists but not at that location so even when we toyed with the idea of recreating our first date, we would have to meet for hamburgers instead of pizza.
The date went well enough that we made plans to meet again.
I am three years older.
Who is taller:
He is by a smidge.
Who said I love you first?
He did, actually, on my birthday. I think we'd been dating for about three months at that point.
Most of the time, him.
Also, him. He's partially deaf and possesses a naturally deep, booming sort of voice.
I can project if I need to but I tend toward soft and quiet.
I'm not sure about this one. I might have to claim this one. I'm usually pretty easy going but sometimes I can be surprisingly difficult. My ego can get the better of me from time to time. I know better but sometimes it takes me some time to get past it.
Falls asleep first:
Usually me. He's prone to anxiety and depression while I tend to exist more in the moment so things that bother him usually don't affect me.
Definitely him. He could probably open a restaurant whereas my best effort is usually slightly burned frozen pizzas.
Better morning person:
Definitely me. I love getting up in the morning (if I've slept enough) and puttering around over a few cups of coffee.
Definitely him. I drive cautiously and slowly, with the occasional bout of impatient honking and muttering to myself.
I don't know. I haven't seen him be competitive but it's possible he can be. I'm generally not real invested in most competitions, but if it's something I worked hard on, my ego can make the occasional appearance. I know better but sometimes my ego still gets the better of me.
I don't tend to do comedy well so I'll give this one to him.
Where do you eat out most as a couple:
I think our favorite restaurant is the Smiling Dog. I loved the English pub style decoration back when it was the Londoner and I still love the English pub style food.
Who is more social:
Definitely him. We're both introverted but he is more social than I am.
Who is the neat freak:
Strangely, me. I'm not really a super neat person but compared to him, I feel a little anal retentive.
Where was your first kiss:
At the end of the first date
Who initiated your first kiss:
I don't remember
How long did it take to get serious:
Probably a few years. We were both previously married so neither of us was prone to excessive romanticism or urgency. Slow and steady seemed to work best for us
Plans date night:
Don't really do those any more. We do have day time adventures from time to time but currently those are either going to the park or taking long socially distanced street walks.
Who picks where you go to dinner:
It's sort of a collaborative effort. I may suggest something which apparently he already had for lunch so we'll settle on something.
Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong:
This is harder. We can both be a tough nut to crack. He takes a while to wind down and I have ego issues. I know better but it still takes me a while to get there.
Who wears the pants in the relationship:
I don't care for this question. It's 2021. We should have evolved past this as a society by now.
Who has the most tattoos:
We both only have one but mine is larger.
Who sings better:
He has a pleasant voice and I would not inflict my voice on the world.
Hogs the remote:
We usually agree on a show before we turn on the television so neither of us hogs it. I prefer to let him handle the remotes because there is more than one and I hate trying to figure out which buttons to press. Do I press the circle or the x or one of the arrows? It's too confusing.
Spends the most:
It depends on the category. I probably spend more at the grocery store because I'm buying for me and my teenagers. He spends more on take away. He spends more on game and leisure equipment. I spend much more on art supplies and shoes, but in the final calculations, it's probably him because I think his gaming hobbies are probably pretty pricy. Still, it's his money so I don't really concern myself with it. (Just as how much I spent on all those art markers is never discussed.)
Did you go to the same school:
Completely different states
Where is the furthest you two have traveled together:
Just to Lafayette or New Orleans
Who drives when you are together:
Usually him as I don't really enjoy driving and he likes his truck
My final takeaway is that it can be hard to find someone that loves you as you are: flaws and all. It can be hard to find someone that wants you to be a better version of yourself; not someone else, but you, your essential you.
If you find them, hold onto them tight. Give them all that love and all that loyalty. Entwine your paths and move into the future together.