Somehow I made it to the Top Ten of Best of 225 for Best Visual Artist. I am thrilled just to be nominated, but apparently, I am vain enough that I would really like to win so if you feel inclined to throw a vote my way, I would be really grateful! Voting is open until April 7th.
In my best, or most self-delusional moments, I've often thought that I'm not competitive. I don't mind losing games. When I'm not the best at something, usually, I'm not particularly bothered, but sometimes, just sometimes, I discover a strangely competitive streak inside me.
I like being accepted into exhibitions and festivals, but if I don't win a prize, it doesn't really bother me at all. I'm not sure why I feel differently about this contest.
My partner and I both started working the Wordle competition every day and we usually share screenshots after we both solve it. Why does it make me happy when I solve it in fewer tries? It shouldn't matter, but somehow I've become competitive about Wordle.
A cornerstone of my personal philosophy has long been that we shouldn't look at life as a competition. We can all do well. Just because someone else is thriving doesn't mean that we can't thrive too. Just because someone else is successful, it doesn't mean that we can't also be successful.
We can support each other and all thrive together, but here I am, in a contest with nine other artists, and I want to win. One of the other artists I know and have done shows with. We've always been friendly and any other year I would absolutely vote for her and share her name all over social media, but instead, I am wanting to win.
It shouldn't matter, but somehow it does. Clearly, I have things to work out. Me and ego need to sit down and have a long talk about why I'm feeling so competitive. Art shouldn't be a popularity contest. My work has value whether people in the 225 area code even know who I am.
I know all this and I need to sit with this truth and make peace with it, but, in the meantime, I will continue to ask for votes.
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